The confession of a saint starets, father Philotheos Zervakos – found after his death, among his notes:
-I don`t love God from all my heart and with all my mind.
-I don`t follow God`s commandments.
– I don`t pray and study carefully.
-At the holy services and vigils even during the holy liturgy I stand in the church without fear, attention and piety.
-Many times I have shameless, dirty, blaspheming thoughts.
-I don`t have true repentance, sadness or tears.
-I don`t confess genuinely and with crushed heart; I don`t have the awareness that my confession is made before the omniscient God, Who is everywhere.
-I don`t love my brother as I love myself.
– I am proud, objectionable, fond of vain glory, loving myself, talkative, I seek to be admired by people, I speak vanities, I speak in excess, I joke and laugh about stupid things, I slander, I judge, I condemn, I lie, I get angry, I remember the wrongdoings done to me by others.
-I don`t have restraint, patience, gentleness, humbleness.
-I am the slave of my stomach, greedy, I eat in secret, I am capricious and fickle.
-I sin with my words and deeds, willingly and unwillingly, awarely and unawarely; I am idle and lazy and because of this reason many times I have bad and shameful desires and shameful, dirty and proud thoughts
For these sins I confessed before God and before you, father and for many countless others I forgot to confess, because of my oblivion or ignorance, I ask for forgiveness from God.
