Not the man is bad, who controls him is

`They say that we are all born equal. I sincerely don’t believe that there are people  who are born bad and others who are born good.

But I think that life, the experiences he goes through may shape him in a way or another. I discussed many times with the father about the badness of the people and thus I understood that I thought badness belonged to the people and not to those who influenced them in a bigger or smaller extent.`

`Father, if someone offends you, what do you do?`

`I don’t do anything.`

`But what if he goes on and curses you? I suppose you must have a reaction.

`I have none.`

`That’s unbelievable, but what if he pushes you or uses other forms of physical violence?`

`I will not respond.`

`It’s impossible, there are natural human reactions of self defence, of rejection. The man hurt you and you can’t stay with your arms crossed.`

`Son, I want you to understand a simple thing, it’s not the man who is my enemy, but the demon who controls him. If I answer, I don’t solve anything and the demon rejoices. If I hurt the man he suffers and the demon doesn’t. On the contrary I may offer him a great joy which would sadden me.

`Then how to solve a situation of this kind?`

`The solution is simple. The humbleness someone proves in a dispute makes the demon to go away. The demon doesn’t stand humbleness. What’s the consequence? After the demon leaves and takes away with him all his temptations, the men will reconcile. `This is the truth. Humbleness is such an easy word but for any man it’s so hard to apply it.`

`It’s not hard as long as you associate humbleness with love. And if you consider the person who is in front of you as being God`s creation just as well as you are, if you consider him your brother you will forgive him. Not necessarily in words, but in your heart. Once forgiving him and being reconciled with yourself and aware that he is not the author of that blamable event but the forces of the darkness, you automatically change your disposition in what regards him. You give him some mitigating circumstances. And in your soul grow feelings like mercy, maybe even compassion.

`So what should I do afterwards?`

`You have no other choice than to pray for the soul of that man for being saved and for being forgiven for the wrong he had done. You can eventually mention his name in your akathist. You know the commandment of our Lord Jesus Christ to forgive our enemies and `Love each other as I have loved you.

It’s quite clear, isn’t it? Verbal or physical violence are excluded. They don’t bring any solution. I hope you understood.

`I hope that too although it will be hard for me to apply what I learnt`

`But not impossible` said the father smiling.

Excerpt from the book Down to earth,  complete edition, author Ionuț Riteș.

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