My son, I received your letter and I saw in it your worry. But do not get upset, my child. Do not worry so much. Even if you fell, stand up again. You are called at the path to heaven.
It is no wonder if the one who runs stumbles. He only needs to have patience and repentance in every moment.
Therefore take a bow whenever you make a mistake and do not lose your time. The longer is your delay to apologize the more you give rights to the cunning one to expand his roots within you. Do not let him ground his roots for your damage.
Thus do not despair when you fall but getting up quickly take a bow saying : Forgive me, my Christ, I am but human and helpless.`
This is not an abandonment but because you still have a big worldly pride and vanity Christ let you make mistakes and fall. This is to know your helplessness every day and have understanding for those who fall; do not judge your brothers when they make mistakes but support them.
So whenever you fall get up again and apologize. Do not hide sadness in your heart because the joy of the cunning is sadness discouragement and from these many are growing and the soul of the one who has these is filled with bitterness. While the disposition of that one who repents says: `I sinned. Forgive me, father.` and he expels sadness. `Am I not a helpless man ?` he says. Therefore what shall I do?` It is true indeed my son, so take courage.
When the grace of God will come only then the man will stand on his feet. Otherwise without grace he always stumbles and always falls. Take courage and do not fear anything.
Did you see how your brother you write about endured the temptation ? Do the same. Get a brave way of thinking against the temptations coming to you. They come anyway because you need them, you don`t purify yourself otherwise. Leave aside what your idleness and akedia tell you. Do not be afraid of them. IN the same way the ones from before passed away by the Grace of God these will pass as well after they will do their acts.
Temptations are medicine and medicinal plants which heal the manifested passions and our hidden wounds.
Thus be patient to have a gain every day and get a reward, rest and joy from the cashier of the Kingdom of heaven. For the night the night of death comes when nobody will work anymore. For this reason hurry up as the time is short.
Know this as well: it is better a life of a single day but triumphant with prizes and crowns than many years of life in recklessness. The strife of a day made in awareness and the feeling of the soul values as 50 years without knowledge of the one who struggles recklessly
Without struggle and blood shedding do not expect any release of passions. Thorns and thistles grow from our land after the violation of the commandment. We want purification but the passions are uprooted with a lot of pain with bleeding hands and many sighs. Cry, shed rivers of tears to soften the land of your heart. After the land will be watered then it will be easier to uproot the thorns.
Excerpt from Confessions of the monachal experience– Pious Joseph the Hesychast, Evanghelismos.
